In a recent post I said I would call my story the Adoption Trilogy. Why? I am a big Star Wars fan. As I was going through my third Chinese adoption and looking back, it felt a little like those movies. In the first movie, the good guys prevail over the evil empire. Our first adoption was flawless, well the Chinese side of the adoption. The American side could constitute the conflict with the empire. I would equate the empire with DCF.
In the Empire Strikes Back, the empire prevails over the good guys. They manage to come out of the battle shaken up, but determined to keep fighting. Our second adoption was much like that. Things changed in the way China adopted out children. It was made tougher and stricter. Waits for healthy children went from a year to many years. At this point, we decided that we could take in a special needs child. We went for an older child. Even with knowing that RAD(Reactive Attachment Disorder) could exist. Like the rebels depending on the Force, we too believed in a power that could push us along. There have been many challenges on this adoption. It was not just from the child. When in China, we did not seem to fit with the families. It was almost as they looked down on us. It was still a great trip with our children.
In Return of the Jedi, the rebels overtook the empire and tied up everything nicely. The last adoption we went through was a little like that. It started out great. We got along with the families. In Cheng Du, we had some challenges. We did not expect our daughter to be more like an infant than a toddler. Our guide was good, but she had home issues that she dealt with. In Guangzhou, our guide was sick. But she soldiered on. She also had another family, in addition to the three she was guiding. They had a major issue. In the end, our daughter is excelling. She grows stronger everyday.
Our child with RAD is doing great. She gets along with everyone and is really trying. Her grades are getting better. In the end, its been a great experience. Now to the unknown. We are embarking on another addition to this story. Who knows what it will bring. We are in uncharted territory. Hopefully, the end result will be another happy child getting a family that will love her.
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